VitaminWater this week announced a new contest where a lucky contestant (or unlucky depending on your perspective) can win 100 grand for returning to a mid-2000s era feature phone.

If you want to enter the contest, you’ll have to post a photo to your Twitter or Instagram account, tag VitaminWater, and tell them why you need a year-long break from your smartphone. You also need to tell them what you would do to survive or pass the time over that year period. The company notes that you should add the hashtags #nophoneforayear and #contest to your social media post.

The guidelines to win the $100,000 are as follows:

you may not use any smartphone for 365 days. if txting is a pleasant experience or you can get on the internet, it’s probably a smartphone.
this means you may not physically operate, caress, hug or otherwise be physically affectionate with anyone’s smartphone
if you’re lying in bed and miss your phone, do not attempt to sneak a midnight scroll… just close your eyes and dream about vitaminwater…

No thanks, Vitamin Water.  A year without an iPhone? I just checked screen time, and I’m at nearly four hours per day.  I wouldn’t do this for a million dollars; honestly, I’d rather die. It’s crazy to think that most of us have actually lived the majority of our lives without a smartphone, yet, now we cannot even comprehend a life without them.  How could I ever live without Instagram? A life in which I cannot get attention and validation from random people online? Yikes. No Tinder, no Hinge, no sliding in DM’s? How in the fuck am I supposed to even meet a girl without my phone?  It’s preposterous. What do the iPhone-less poors even do with their lives? Go outside? Read books? Couldn’t be me.