There was once a dark time in history when groups of people were forced to wear certain symbols to distinguish themselves from the rest of society.  Today, people do this with glee. They proudly sport their little badges of poverty, letting the world know “Hey guys, I’m a poor!”. We’re talking bumper stickers.  Nothing makes me more irrationally angry than seeing bumper stickers on the car in front of me. Wait, is it even irrational, though? I think I’m justified in loathing these mongrels who so proudly display their lack of basic human intelligence/401ks to the world.  Let’s examine some of these creatures.

Ahhh, the classic confederate flag.  You know this guy frequently uses the n word when he’s not busy verbally abusing his 4 year old daughter, beating his wife, and committing welfare fraud.

The guy whose entire self worth revolves around his truck.  Another classic. You’d rather be cummin’ than strokin’? I think that’s some sort of reference to an engine?  Idk, but I’m quite sure that the only thing you’re cumming in is your sofa cushion.

The fact that you don’t realize misspell is one word says enough.  I bet your parents were so proud when you graduated from DeVry!

A white van, plastered in Eminem stickers…yeah, there’s a woman tied up back there.  

The type of person that preaches religion yet hates anybody that isn’t of that religion.  He’ll go to church in the morning then hit the Klan meeting at night. Don’t you dare try to tell this guy that Jesus couldn’t have been white.

The gun guy.  He’ll preach about the second amendment with his vast knowledge garnered from his Intro to American Politics I course at Coastal Alabama Community College, in which he earned a 2.3.  He’s a HUGE Tucker Carlson guy.  He’ll tell you that the Mexicans are ruining America while he sits around collecting welfare & watching Married With Children.


As you can see, there’s a common theme here.  Do you see any Audi’s, BMW’s or Mercedes’ in these pics?  No?  You wanna know why?  Because bumper stickers are for poors.